Leading the Way as a First-Gen Jefa with Dr. Lisette Sanchez

​Beatriz: Hey there, beautiful souls and welcome back to the Beabosscoaching Podcast. I'm your host Beatriz, and I'm so thrilled that you're here with us today. I am really excited to bring you a very special conversation today with a very special woman. Today I'm leading the conversation with Dr. Lisette Sanchez.

This woman is incredible. She's an entrepreneur, she's a licensed psychologist A whole doctora in counseling psychology, and a sought after speaker who's making waves and how we think about first gen identity and leadership.

In this episode, we dive in into some really interesting topics. Dr. Lisette will share her wisdom on how to identify your next steps when you're feeling overwhelmed by all the possibilities. We talk about the power of staying focused on just one step at a time instead of getting paralyzed. By the big picture, and we talk about something that I think a lot of us struggle with, which is asking for opportunities even when it feels scary or uncomfortable.

Here's what really gets me excited about this conversation. Dr. Lisette has this really beautiful way of reminding us that as first gen professionals, we are already confident. Yep, you heard that, right? The very experiences that sometimes make us feel like we don't belong, for example, being the first in our family to go to college is actually incredible proof that we are confident and resilient. So grab your favorite beverage, get comfortable, get ready for a conversation that's going to leave you inspired and empowered and seen.

And ready to take on whatever is next. This is the kind of energy that we need as we continue expanding in our careers and in our lives. So let's dive in.

Beatriz: Okay, so I'm gonna start and it's officially live. So thank you so much Dr. Lisette for coming on to the Beabosscoaching Podcast. I am so excited to have this conversation with you today. I, since I've met you, uh, at that event, at, , the. The Latina Presente event. That was, and you were one of the speakers, and we'll talk a little bit about that, but I'm so excited to get to know more about you and for listeners to get to know you and your story and, , your trajectory.

But why don't you take the time to introduce yourself, um, share what you'd like to share and we'll get started.

Dr. Lissette Sanchez: Okay. Yeah, no, thank you so much, Beatriz. And, uh, I mean, you were a speaker at that event too, so I think that that was a, a special experience that anyone who spoke at that could bond over a little bit. Uh, when you attend an event and you're attending to learn, but you're also putting yourself out of your comfort zone and

Beatriz: Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: memorizing, or, I did not memorize my speech.

I think you memorized your speech. Did you memorize? I

Beatriz: Yeah, I did, I did memorize most of it, but it was also, it was, um, you know, it wasn't too, too long. It was pretty short. It was maybe less than five minutes. It was, you know, four or five minutes. But, uh, it was so interesting to go through that process I try to memorize it. I, as I was. Going through that process and, and meeting with Yvonne who's the creator of that event.

I, she let me know. Actually, that is actually very common because I, I was practicing different parts of the speech in different parts of my, of my apartment to kind of associate. The speech better or memorize it better? I'm not sure, but yours just came out so natural, like so naturally. So I am curious how your process is and what you're, I mean, and you're also a much more seasoned speaker, so I'd love to know, but tell us

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: Yeah. Yeah.

Beatriz: let us know who you are.

Dr. Lissette Sanchez: I, I have a hard time. Someone's giving me flowers. I'm like, but let's honor the flowers you received at that event too. But, okay, so about me. So again, I'm the to, uh, I go by Dra. Lisette, um, and I have a few different hats. So the doctor comes from being a licensed psychologist. So I have a PhD in counseling psychology.

And when I went into entrepreneurship, initially it was to build my private practice and found that a lot of. Opportunities for speaking started to to happen for me and I really enjoyed them. So this year actually, I'm on my journey where I'm building that pillar of my business, very much focused on public speaking and growing that and push further, pushing myself out our right comfort zone.

So we'll definitely get to talk around like what are these prep process and procedures look like? And I'm also a writer and that role is especially important to me, the speaker and the writer role because a psychologist, that was my dream. I saw myself doing this therapy, working in maybe as a professor, doing that kind of knowledge sharing connection

Beatriz: Mm-hmm.

Dr. Lissette Sanchez: up, I think mostly the, the helping portion.

I think always seeing myself as a helper and but I, I was always really shy when I was younger, I was pretty quiet. I was not the student who raised her hand in class to ask questions. You know, when you interact with me, you may think of me more of as an extrovert, but in many of these spaces I did not have feel very confident at all.

I was very quiet, and when it came to my writing, you know, when I first started college, I was in a remedial writing class, uh, when it was a struggle getting through my doctoral program 'cause of all of the writing involved, right? So I got through it and so these two pillars of my business I think are especially important to me because they were the areas where, you know, when I was younger, did not feel like strengths in any capacity.

Um, and I think further connects to this big point that I make as a person who specializes in working with first gen professionals and talking about, and learning about how our unique lived experiences really are what shaped the, the kind of professional we are and often we look at those experiences negatively.

You know, like I might look at having to have been a voice for my parents, having to translate for them having to care for them. Um, of course there's moments where I wish I could have just been a kid, right? Just be a child that plays with no worries.

Beatriz: Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: But I look back and I recognize how much of a gift that those experiences were when it comes to what I get to do now, right?

Like I learned to, I learned to lead, um, and I learned to take risks because of them and since I'm talking about my parents very quickly, I'm, uh, the eldest daughter of immigrants. Yeah, from my parents are immigrants from Mexico and El Salvador.

Beatriz: Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: I have one younger brother, um, and I'm, we've had very different paths, but I'm very proud of him and everything that he does as well.

Uh, and. So, yeah, I think that's a little bit about the different aspects of my identity, like my roots, where I grew up, my immediate family, my professional. And then I think something just fun about me. Things that I like, I like, I love plants. You can see some of my plants behind me. Um, I have a cat that if you follow me on any social media, he will make an appearance.

He is a big fat black cat. His name is Louis. Um. And my biggest support system like was a cheerleader, is my, my husband. Um,

Beatriz: Yeah. Oh, that's amazing. Well, thank you so much for sharing all of that and sharing a little bit about you too, and like who you are as a person. Right. What really struck me is, uh. You know, some, I, as I gotten to know your work and gotten to know how you help people use their cultural identity to, to be leaders and to show up in this space the way that you described it around, sometimes feeling the this negative.

Aspect of being parentified perhaps, or like having to do these really adult things when we were young. But then that actually the other side of that is that we learned how to take care of ourselves, show up for our people. And so seeing the other you explaining that. It's such a refreshing way to see that.

Yes, we, as first gen, I'm also the eldest daughter. Like sometimes we get so tired of being in that role. Right. But remembering just like how we show up for people and how that makes us as, as humans, how that shapes us as humans. I think it's, it's such an important reminder. Uh, that, that we shouldn't have a skill that we should have.

So that's amazing. Well, thank you for sharing Dr. Lisette. And, um, you know, I feel honored like, so something for me, you know, like as eldest daughters, I think we try to go all going all the way for me meant like we have to go to be a doctor ura. Um, and, but I never saw too many, like people like me, Latinas actually reach that and, and do that.

it is An achievement that is so incredible. And so I just wanna acknowledge , that you doing that is such a great example for, for like many people like me and like little girls who are like thinking, is that even possible? It's how long does it take? You know? Um, but thank you for being that example.

Um, and I do wanna go into that, but first I wanna check in with you. So. I wanna check in, where are you at right now in, in your season of life? Like where are you currently? What season of life are you currently in? And if you'd like to share, just checking in with you in this moment in time.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: Yeah. Yeah, so I think that. That's, that's such a big question. So I wanna say

Beatriz: Yeah.

Beatriz: Where am I in this season of my life? Because

Beatriz: Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: you'll know about me, probably throughout this conversation, I have so many big passions, so many big dreams, and I, so I think I would say that what I wanna say, I think I'm in my season of anything is possible, but I know that that's been the belief that I've had. Since before, there's a reason I have a PhD and, and that I

Beatriz : Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: right? Because I think there was a part of me that always believed that anything was possible, even if I didn't feel that I could fully name that or embrace that, uh, even if I didn't really understand it. Um, but I think if I, if I think of like my mantra now, um, it's, anything is possible.

I just have to take action, um, and think about sort of what that looks like. Um, and that applies to all facets of my life, the personal, the professional, like the, you know, what, whatever it might be. So I think of it in, in the personal sense. Um, I, um, you know, my, my husband and I, we've been married for almost two years now, so we're, we're in the stage of our life as we're thinking and planning for our future family, right?

So, um, and kind of going through and experiencing that process and what it's like to. You know, challenge beliefs that I grew up with around how, what the timeline looks like for people to get pregnant when they start trying. Um, and then also like honoring my timeline around why, why wanted to wait

Beatriz: Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: why we know, like that that was so important for me and like navigating that.

So I see like that kind of personal, um, and like I mentioned my husband a bit, my, we're in a season of, he's. He broke his ankle recently. So of navigating supporting him, but also supporting each other, like continuing our partnership and what that looks like. Um, so I'd say like those, lots of these personal, um.

I dunno what I would call those. I always wanna call them milestones, right? Of these experiences of when you go through any kind of challenge together, it only brings us closer and you grow, right? So like I feel that, and then professionally, I mentioned this earlier, but I think the season of making my speaker hat, being the primary hat that I wear when it comes to entrepreneurship.

Beatriz: Yeah. Yeah. I think it just goes to show just how multifaceted life is, right? Just like all the things, all the the things we wanna accomplish personally, the things we wanna accomplish professionally. Uh, and, uh, I think as women, I, I was just in a workshop this weekend where it was, uh, a workshop that focused on futurism and imagining a world that we wanna live in and, and what could be possible.

And I was thinking, imagine if there was a way that Women were dominant in the tech space or the entrepreneurship space, how would that shape our society? Would we still have worries about family over career or vice versa? You know? And so, but I feel like we, as women, we are constantly, individually, but also collectively redefining that all the time.

Just like what that means. So. That's incredible. Well, thank you for sharing. Um, okay, so with this theme that, that I really wanted to touch on this season for the Beabosscoaching Podcast, I've been wanting to touch on just this theme of expansion. I feel like expansion, just, At least for me, that's, that's been a, a recurring theme that it is this whole, since the beginning of this year, it has been a theme that has shown up in different parts of my life, professionally and personally, and, uh, and definitely feeling that and I, in, in navigating what expansion looks like and how it shows up in our entrepreneurship journeys and.

Our careers and in life. I wanted to talk to other badass jefas and, and women who are also building themselves, building their careers and building their entrepreneurship journeys and watching that unfold. And so I wanted to ask you and I, this is like overall, um. This question, I ask , all my guests this season is what does expansion mean to you? how you think about expansion and, and what does that mean to you.

Dr. Lissette Sanchez: Yeah, I think of expansion as change.

Beatriz: Mm-hmm.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: I, as I, I think the first word that comes to mind is growth, but growth happens through change. And often the first change that people have to make is that mindset. The mindset around your belief around what is your capacity for expansion, right? Like, what is your capacity for growth?

Some of us may sometimes set a limit on what our capacities for expansion, for even reasons that you just explained now. Right. When we live in a society that, you know, I'm telling, I'm sharing with you about, you know, like I, I'd like to start a family, I've definitely spent a lot of time thinking about like, well, what would it look like when I.

Beatriz: Yeah,

Dr. Lissette Sanchez: When I give birth, what does that mean for my business as an entrepreneur? What would I have to prepare? What would I do? Um, and I don't think my husband needs to have the same kinds of thoughts or like preparedness in the way that I do, right? Because for the person giving birth, um, there's a different physical, um, I guess ex commitment expectation that happens around that time.

So kind of navigating that, um, and. You know, uh, when we, well, before we even started trying, so I wanna kind of like bring it back to this because I had a huge mindset shift here that helped me with growth and helped me be less afraid of it because as much as I've always wanted kids, lemme tell you that.

It's terrifying. It's terrifying experience. And I would think about it and I'm like, oh, because as an entrepreneur, I'm like, well, what would that mean? Like, how, what do I do? And.

Beatriz: Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: Um, then, then I thought like, am I really gonna approach something that I've wanted or that I want in my life? Um, with so much, I don't wanna say fear because it is, any big change is scary, but with so much negativity around the what ifs.

What if this, what if not, what if, whatever. And I had this moment where I'm like, why? Why? Why is that the way that I'm shaping the way that I think about this? Why don't I think about. The positives that this could do for me. The things that I can do, the the, and not the, not the but not the what if, but the, and I get to do this and I still get to run my business and I still get to do that.

And it might just look a little bit different than what it looks like today, but I'm still gonna be able to do the things that I want to do. So then coming back to your question on expansion, it's going back to your thought process to like our listeners and recognizing, well, what is your "what if" or your "but" that is kind of in your way, and how do you shift that to a way of thinking AND like, "I can do this" and you know, whatever.

Like I can become a public speaker and you know, and, and a parent or I can be a public seeker and be afraid while I'm doing it, but still do it. Right. Whatever your and is not, I want to do this, but I'm too afraid. It's, "AND"

Beatriz: Mm. Yeah. Like adding the "AND", I think, I mean, it, it speaks to your work, right? As the, the work that you already do with, with people and looking at those experiences that we've, that we've experienced as first gen Latinas and our cultural roots and looking at those experiences and looking Well, yeah, I translated these documents from my, my parents and I learned how to be very responsible, you know, early on.

Right? So it's really that mindset shift that I I totally agree comes into play when it comes to what it looks like to grow in your career, to expand and I, I call it expansion. And I, I do see like growth in, in expansion sort of interchangeably because like. Expansion feels like something getting faster, like within somehow, uh, whether it's within your business or maybe the way you perceive or look at your situations,

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: Yeah.

Beatriz: um, or like getting braver, getting more courageous as you come to.

Different, milestones in your journey as a, as an entrepreneur. Um, and so that, that leads me to this question around how you deciding to pursue your PhD and, uh, your decision to pursue your PhD in psychology. Um, how did that decision. to expand your, your education, expand into this need to wanna start a business or, or use that to start your business as, as a way to connect others to their cultural, to their cultural strengths.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: Thank you. Yeah. Okay, so really quick. Um. The PhD took a really long time. Just to give people an example of the timeline for, they took, I did my master's right after my undergrad, so my undergrad was four years. Then I did two years of my master's. I applied directly to doctoral programs, but I had one PhD interview and I was admitted to a master's program and I was admitted to a master's program in New York, and I know you lived there for a little bit.

Beatriz. So, you know, I was like, I have an opportunity. Well actually you lived there for a lot of it. I think you said eight years. I was listening to another one of your episodes. You were there for a while. And I was there for two, um, for the two years that I did my master's there. And, uh, it was at teacher's College at Columbia.

And so when I got in, I was like, I gotta go there. This is great opportunity to live in New York. I'm from San Fernando Valley in North Hollywood. Um, I still remember finding out and telling anyone who would. Like look my way. Like I got into Columbia. I got, you know, like the excitement that I felt about getting in and that's why I went there to make myself more competitive for PhD.

Quick side note, my parents told them, the reason I'm saying Columbia is because when I told them I got into Columbia and I for my master's, they were like, you're moving to another country. So like for them, idea.

Beatriz: They thought it was Colombia, the country.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: They thought it was Columbia. I'm like, no, mom, it's New York. It's a really good school dad. It's, you know, to this day, you know, like, I think they get it a little bit more now, but they still, you know, they're just proud of their kid. Right. Um.

Beatriz: Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: Uh, that, so that was four years, two years, and then the PhD itself.

And I ended up going back to the west coast at, to University of Oregon. And I was there for six years. My, so then 6, 2, 8, 4, 12. And then you have a year of your postdoc. 'cause after you graduate, you still have to do one year of licensing. So 13 years from graduating high school to becoming a licensed psychologist.

Beatriz: Yes. Yeah. I mean, incredible. I mean, I, it's wild. It's like the same amount of time it takes to become a medical doctor. Right. But it's now, this is literally psychology, so, yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: Yes. Yeah. And so, but I wanna say that, so then, and then wanna come back is when I was a kid. When I was in sixth grade, seventh grade, that's my earliest memory of telling someone I wanted to be a psychologist. When I said I wanted to be a psychologist, I had no idea that I had signed up for a 13 year dream or a career, right?

Like I thought. You know, this is, I say this is what I'm gonna do, and then I'm gonna go to college and that's what's gonna happen. And so you can imagine my surprise when I get into, you know, my undergrad, I went to uc, San Diego as a psychology major, and I, yes, I'm gonna be a psychologist when I graduate because first gen, I don't know, my parents didn't even go to high school.

Okay? Like I'm

Beatriz: Yeah,

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: it out. So. I get to school and I think the first semester, first quarter or maybe within my first year, we had to take a seminar that was called Careers in Psychology so that I could know what my options were. So I remember showing up first day to that class and ready to learn about what I could do with this psychology degree.

So, you know, imagine yourself like brand new college student, you're halfway getting lost to find this classroom. You sit down, you're nervous before all the classes, and then you're ready to learn. And the professor then talks about the careers, then mentions, you could be a psychologist, but to be a psychologist you need this advanced degree.

And I sat there and I thought, oh wow. So I don't get to be a psychologist when I finish this bachelor's. That's okay. So then. I sat down, I was like, well, what do I need to even be eligible to apply

Beatriz: Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: and learned that one, I really needed to increase my GPA 'cause my first quarter at college, remember I talked about re remedial writing classes and challenges.

I had a 2.7, 2.6 or something, GPA.

Beatriz: Mm.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: Um, and when I look, it's like most applications require a minimum of 3.0. But really you want more to be competitive. So that's the only thing I focused on was, well, my next step is I have to increase my GPA so that I could even apply to these programs, and every single next step after that on my journey was.

Just one more step. What is the next step that I need to take? Not what are the next 30 steps that I'm gonna need to take? Because it really was a lot. But in my mind, the way that everything seemed doable and achievable, achievable and possible was to just think of, well, what's my immediate next step? What's the next thing that I can do? So at that time was increase my GPA. So then it's doing the things that I needed that then learning about the resources available to me to help me with that. Then like. Accessing those resources. I went into a Master's instead of directly into a PhD because I didn't get into a PhD my first round, but I got into a master's program, so I thought, well, that's my next step.

It's doing this program before the PhD. Um, and what I wanna come back to, remember the lessons from our immigrant parents is. My parents, they instilled in me the belief of, you know, betting on ourselves and taking those risks because they took the biggest risk of all by

Beatriz: Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: to the U.S. They left everything they knew.

ist, and it happens December,: 2019

I'm working at the University counseling Center focused on first gen college students, and that's what I, that's where I wanna be. That's part that's, I start thinking, you know, this is where I'll be at this university, then I'll retire. You start to visualize your dream, your life, then. You know where March, December, 2020, I said, December, 2019, we're going into 2020, which is the beginning of the pandemic.

And suddenly my, the work culture shifted significantly. So now you know what I had envisioned would be my dream career, dream job. It became a space where I was heavily burned out, exhausted, um, struggling with my own mental health and wellness as I was doing this career that I, I, in my mind was like, this is my dream career.

Why am I so stressed out all the time and.

Beatriz: Yeah.

I first met my husband July,: 2020

Um, but he caught on to really quickly how I complaint about work a lot,

Beatriz: Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: And he said one thing to me that stays with me until even now, it's. You know, he's like, you should, you should try to do this on your own. Uh, and I was like, I'm scared. He's like, well, you know, those jobs are not going anywhere.

You can always try and if it doesn't work out, you can go back to the job. Like, it's not think in my mind. Every next step that I had taken up until that point, um, there was a reason or purpose for it, right? Like, to get to that PhD, to get to this degree, to get to this job. And I'm at this job and I'm gonna look at how to potentially lose it, like

Beatriz: Mm.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: how to fail at this job.

And, but when he's like, the job's not going anywhere, you're just gonna try and see if you can do it on your own. And if, if that doesn't work, you go back. And something about that statement made it so clear to me because I was, when we talk about burnout, I was having physical illness. I had to take medical disability leave because of how sick I was getting from all of the stress.

So it was definitely, uh, my body was telling me because I wasn't ready to accept it, and so launched the business to go into private practice and, and then fell in love with entrepreneurship. Realize that this is, this is where I get to be in my creative zone of genius. I think people

Beatriz: Mm-hmm.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: things, but what I found, you know, what I always wanted as a psychologist, and I, I could name this when I was younger, was I wanted to be a psychologist because I always wanted options.

I wanted options. When it came to my career, I wanted to know that there would always be something I could do, and. Somewhere that message got lost to, I want the stable job, the 401k, the like golden handcuffs that many people now reference. And then I thought when I went into entrepreneurship, I felt like, wow, I really.

Was starting to limit myself again, limit my expansion. 'cause this whole episode's about expansion, right? I was limiting my expansion when I was just trying to figure out how to, how to work within the system. Um, where what I needed was my own space where I wasn't limited by the different bureaucracies or rules that happened when you're working for an agency, right?

So went into entrepreneurship. Knew nothing about private practice. So like I, I share these pieces because oftentimes we think like, well, um, if you know something, maybe it's easier. Yeah, of course. If you have some kind of network already, it helps. But it's not impossible to do it without a network. I think that's what I hope people leave with today, leave with the message is that when I say anything is possible, it's just about identifying that first step.

So we went back to, well, step one, I know. I don't know anyone in private practice full-time. At that time I didn't know anyone, but I knew some people who had a part-time private practice. So started talking to them, talking to people, then they knew, and building my network that way. Networking, as you probably know yourself and you've experienced the most powerful tools that we have available to us.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: So. Just like before, taking steps, taking one step at a time and recognizing, well, what do you need? And I realized what I needed. Step one was a network, because I didn't even know where to start with

Beatriz: Mm-hmm.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: practice, but I could start by reaching out to the people I knew, get introduced to more people and going, and again, this is also beginning of like, this is also, oh, this was still.

back timeline. It was April,: 2021

Uh, freshly graduated. So something just around my career, when you get a PhD in counseling psychology, at least for me, after you graduate, you get licensed that year that you're getting your licensing hours, you are getting paid as a, essentially think of as an intern. So my first year, even though I had my PhD, I.

$30,000 that year. Um, living in Southern California, my cat had gotten sick, required, you know, so there's a lot of other financial stressors that I had, and at that time I thought like, I don't actually have, when I would Google like, what do you need to do this? It all required a pretty high amount of investment, financial investment that I just quite literally didn't have at the time because I was just transitioning to working for myself and to having a salary.

After paying off and I had medical debt for my cats. So like there's a lot going on. So if anyone's wondering why not, that is another path. If you, if you have saved money and you have resources, then you can hire a lawyer. You can find people that can like, help build the practice. But the networking part's still really important for any career that you do, especially as an entrepreneur, you want to be in touch with other people who do what you do, um, because these are the people who.

We'll help refer you more business or just help you out and help entrepreneurship as amazing as it is for creative experiences, it can also be isolating if you're not intentional about community. Um, so taking one step at a time and loved it, loved the private practice, and then found myself with just opportunities, uh, from uh, companies reaching out, asking me to speak for them, and then.

Me one time asking like, can I help with something else? And being offered an opportunity to write, uh, and so, and saying yes, even though it was scary. So my, my formula for when I think of my like path was taking one step at a time, asking for help that's part of networking. Then it's being open-minded about the opportunities that are available to you and being willing to ask for maybe something that you, you do not feel ready for, and trusting that it's going to be okay.

So the example I'll give is I write, I'm a frequent contributor to hip Latina. I write for them on average once a month now, and I focus on first gen Latina mental health. And I have, I got that opportunity because initially they reached out to me, they asked me to do an Instagram live with them. And when we finished Instagram live, I thought, you know, I really enjoyed that.

I enjoyed working with them. I'd love to continue working with them. And so I, I just asked, is there a possibility for us to continue working together? I'm sorry, I'm hitting my computer. Is there a possibility? I got excited. Is there a possibility for us to continue to work together in some way? And then they asked me, they're like, well, do you write, do you feel comfortable with writing? Remember earlier what I said, writing was

Beatriz: the writing. Yeah,

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: It was hard. It was remedial writing because I was like, do I write, I'm sitting over my trauma of getting through the dissertation, but, but I, I said yes.

said, yes, I do write Yes, I can do that. I'd love to do that. Let's move forward with that. Um, and then. We got one writing assignment and then I kept asking again for more. I submitted it and it would take me, it still takes me hours, hours to submit this, so like what they pay me versus the amount of time that I spend on it.

Uh, but for me it was an investment in my growth as well in some like personal growth, but also like marketing. All of that helps. And so I kept asking for more until I became a regular contributor. And lemme tell you that this formula of when you have. When it, it, it's part of relationship building, but when someone offers an opportunity for you, it's always asking like, are, is there another way for us to work together?

Asking yourself that if there's something specific you wanna ask for, or even just open-ended like I did with hip Latina, then I had that opportunity and so now I'm learning how to do that as a speaker because when I first got my first speaking engagements, it was the one and done like I did this. And later in this year, now that I've been more intentional about learning and growing, I've learned, Ooh, I'm, I'm supposed to ask for more there too.

I'm supposed to ask for more collaboration and ongoing opportunities, and we can talk about that, but I know it was a very long way of sharing, sharing my journey.

Beatriz: No, that's amazing. I think just like seeing your trajectory and the ways in which, how it unfolded, I think it, it, it just makes it so much easier to imagine the possibilities. Like you said, like anything's possible. Sometimes it's when, you know, we hear stories of, of success all the time and just like how people got to where they are.

But you know, there's a lot of key moments. Um, that sometimes are missing, that l the complete picture and, and hearing your story, it makes. It, it makes it feel like it's possible. Like you can do that too. You can ask for opportunities. You can take it one step at a time. Right. And I think that, that, that is key there too, is being able to not get overwhelmed by all the possibility, all the different things that are, that are possible, and identifying the, the one thing that you need to do next so that you can.

Continue to move in the right direction. Um, so staying, staying the course. And I think that's always hard, like to, to identify the one thing and just staying focused on the one thing that makes it, makes your journey move forward.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: Yeah, and I would say if it gets hard to think about like what's the one thing, then it's, that can feel like a lot of pressure at times. Then it's thinking about like, well, whenever I do have an option presented. I will choose the option that is more aligned with the value, with the goal that I have, right?

So if I am struggling to decide what is my next step towards this big dream, um, and, and that for me, it's, it's speaking right, right now, becoming a full. Having public speaking be the main part of my business, uh, I'm going to be more likely to say yes to those kinds of opportunities, opportunities to be on stage and speak, um, versus opportunities to grow my client, my client base as a a.

Therapist as a psychologist. And in fact this year, that was a choice that I made where I started off the year and I said, I'm not gonna take new clients. I'm not gonna take new clients to make space for this, which is terrifying 'cause clients are my main source of income. I'm not taking new clients and I've had clients get laid off, so they've had to stop.

Seen me, I've had clients outta state, so we can't continue to work together. I've had lots of shifts happening where I was like, I didn't anticipate this many clients would drop off and, and I, now I have a new safety net, right? Remember, my safety number before was there's always a job. There's always a job.

I'm like, I could always open up to new clients, but we are six months into the year and I have still not accepted a new therapy client because I want to make the decisions that are gonna help me have the tying capacity, whatever that is, to actually build myself as a speaker and have that be the primary focus.

And, and my focus is everywhere else. I can't have that happen. And so, um, but yeah, there's lots of moments where I'm like, Ooh. People might email me like, are you taking new clients? Are you available? And those moments, it's especially hard to say no when I know, I just ha I have someone who's about to transition out because they're moving or something.

Right? And so, um, but I'm trusting, trusting my dream and the process in that as I continue to show up, more opportunities will come. And so, you know, we're doing

Beatriz: gold. Yeah. Trust. You gotta trust yourself. You gotta trust in your process and in your decision making. Okay, so I do wanna go into. mean, you've, you've touched a lot on different ways of the ways you, you've moved in your journey. And then as, as you grow in your professional career, as a speaker, as a psychologist, um, have you felt like healing has been.

A big part of that and how has that shown up in, in all of this? Uh, yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: yes, yes. Thank you about these, that's like the best question to ask because. Earlier, remember when I talked about some of the challenges where like I had to find the resources that I had at the time When I first started, my biggest resource that I could give was my time because it wasn't a financial investment.

Um, and sometimes that can make it hard when you don't have the same resources as someone else as you're chasing your dream. But part of being first gen is being resourceful. It's finding, well, what can I do? What are the ways that I can make this work for me?

Beatriz: Mm-hmm.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: And so. Finding the resources that work for you, but not getting caught in what I now commonly hear everyone talk about as a scarcity mindset,

Beatriz: Mm.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: um,

Beatriz: Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: or this crabs and the bucket mentality of this fear that there is not enough for everyone. That there's not enough for you. So I think a big part of that healing is accepting right?

What? What do I have? How do I adapt? Um, but always coming from a space of there will be opportunities out there. Like right now, I would not be able to just trust that things are gonna work out. Um, if I was stuck in a scarcity way of thinking, because then I would have a hard time saying no. Saying no to to like my income and the way that I'm saying now, say yes to a potential.

Uh, for other opportunities because I trust that it's gonna work out. So healing, uh, your mindset is big with that scarcity mindset is so strong. Especially like I work, I grew up in a working class family. We had to be really careful around things. I never asked, I never asked for things because I knew my family couldn't afford it.

And so it immediate so that when I, you know, was. Starting this business, realizing like, I have to be mindful around that. So money, figure out your money, relationship with money and money, trauma. There's so many amazing resources, I can help you with that. Um, so I think that's part of the healing. But I think the biggest step towards my healing, and I am, I'm a psychologist who's in therapy, so I have a therapist.

I see my therapist right now, every other week. Sometimes I'll see her weekly depending on the season of life that I'm in. Uh, and. The healing mindset that I had to really work on was this belief that I needed someone else's permission

Beatriz: Mm-hmm.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: to, to whatever, to do whatever, right? And like, and when I say permission, sometimes it's cloaked as external validation.

You do something and then you wait. Well do other people like that? I did that. How do I feel about that? Um, you're. metrics for how you're looking at this. It's like, are you more focused on how many people are liking that you're doing this versus how much you are actually enjoying doing this? Or are you doing this because you think other people will want you to do this?

Or are you doing this because this is something that you want that's important to you, uh, that you value? Along the way, and I'll, I'll always talk about values. And so healing comes from realizing that you're not waiting for anyone else's permission to take action. Um, for, from small things of if you wanna go see a movie, if you wanna go eat at that restaurant, if you wanna go, you know, whatever it might be, you don't have to wait for anyone else to do that with you.

You can do that alone. You can take the first step towards getting you there prioritize that. Prioritize the things that fill your cup in that way. So the permissions to release that release, the scarcity mindset, , and obviously the larger healing. Larger healing, I think just generally, um, came from accepting my cultural identity, the values that I was raised with, and recognizing those as strengths.

Recognizing how confident I already. Was

Beatriz: Hmm.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: and that fuels how much more confident I am Now like and I, you'll see me, or you hear me say this all the time, if you are first gen, if you're the first person in your family to graduate high school, to go to college, to have a corporate job, whatever it might be, if you're the first.

Only you had no guidance, you're trailblazing, then you are a confident person because it takes confidence to do every one of those things that I just listed. It takes confidence to show up, be the first, be the only to do something with minimal to no guidance and to trust that you're going to figure it out or that as hard as it may be, you will figure it out.

That takes confidence and when I. Had that click for me, like, oh, like I'm a very confident person, like

Beatriz: Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: person saying, you're a very confident person. You just now have to learn how to channel that confidence that's ingrained in you to show up in these other spaces. And confidence doesn't look like not being afraid, not being nervous, not like you're confident.

You can still be afraid. You're confident, you can still be nervous. I still get nervous before any speaking opportunity, no matter how small or how big it is. I am internally, my heart is racing, my palms are sweaty, and I am showing up, and I, and, and I will occasionally, the first few words outta my mouth are shaky.

Beatriz: yeah,

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: Very shaky. And I might be holding the mic and being like, everyone can see, but I'm just holding it. You know, it's moving, but it's, but I'm there because the confidence that it took from me to just stand up there, like that's the confident, right? And you move through, you speak through the shaky voice, the nerves, you find your confidence and you make that connection, and then it, it clicks for you like.

I deserve to be here. Um, and I'm talking about speaking 'cause that's what I'm doing. But that applies to anything that anyone does in their career. Uh, as an entrepreneur, you know, you take the risk and it's scary. Um,

Beatriz: Yeah.

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: sometimes it works out and maybe sometimes it doesn't. But you took another confidence step towards your dream.

Uh, and that's always worth celebrating.

Beatriz: That's amazing. Well, I, I mean, I, I felt so empowered by you right now, and I hope that listeners listening to everything that you had to say in this moment really gave them the energy to understand and to realize that every single courageous step that they've taken is confidence and that that confidence does live.

So thank you for, for that reminder and. Uh, giving us your process and reminding us that everybody. Has the ability and the power to figure out ways to show up even when we're feeling the, for me, it's the sweaty armpits. That's my reaction. Like no matter what I do, if I'm doing a workshop, if I'm doing a podcast, if I am doing a, uh, even like one-on-one coaching session, sometimes I really have to. Now it's a practice that I've come to is I have to meditate before any sort of performance. I mean, I call it performance 'cause it feels like you're stepping onto a stage and wanting to be present. Right? So, um, whether it's one-on-one or podcast or in front of a, a crowd, if of. In a room full of people, , the feeling is gonna be there.

And so for me, I've learned to, to regulate that through, through meditation and literally regulate the, the bodily reactions that are going through all of that. So thank you so much for sharing your journey and your story. I, I wanna wrap it up by asking how can people find you? How can people work with you and connect with you and continue to to share in your story?

Dr. Lisette Sanchez: Yeah. Thank you so much. All right, so you all heard me talk about speaking this whole time, so if you are working for an organization. Uh, or, you know, uh, planning an event, I'd love to come speak at your event. I speak on the intersection of culture, identity, and belonging, and my most requested topic is the imposter phenomenon, but I'll speak on mental health, managing stress in the workplace.

And when I'm speaking to mental health professionals, I'll talk about first gen mental health parentification. And so you can learn more about the topics that I offer on my website and my website's, Calatheawellness.com. It'll be in the show notes, I'm sure but Calathea refers to plants. It's a plant species.

There's one over here in the corner. Um, that's a, a Calathea, it's the one I bought the day that I moved. That I, that I left my job the day I quit my job. I bought that pla and, uh, Calathea symbolized new beginnings or to turn over a new leaf, I believe first gens, we are the new beginnings for our families, our familias.

And so that's why that's extra special for me. So hire me to speak, put me for your next event. I do virtual or in person and I'm would love, I'd love to travel, right? I love going places for that. And. I do write , and to further expand on my thought leadership. And , if you're an organization looking for someone, a new voice , for your media publication , I'm open for that.

And I have a few thoughts available for something that's called Pick my Brain. Um, so oftentimes you're like, oh, pick your brain. How did you do this? How did you do that? Like, well. Let's talk about that. It's like, so I have an offering now let's pick my brain. That's like these one time sessions for people who want to understand.

So think of it like a one-time kind of coaching, I think would be the best way for people to think about. Like as you're thinking about how do I start my speaking career, how do I work with first gen? Like. Individuals, right? I'm first gen myself, how do I launch? I'm happy to share more of my journey, um, and you can reach out for that.

And we would lead with tangible tools. Those are the ways you can work with me. How to connect with me. So I am on Instagram at @thefirstgenpsychologist and on LinkedIn. And LinkedIn. I'm trying to grow my LinkedIn this year. 'cause apparently that's where many of the decision makers are at when it comes to public speaking.

So. Uh, hang out with me on LinkedIn. I'm sharing as much as I can on there, um, more so this year than in the past. And so, and there you can find me using my name, Dr. Lisette Sanchez, or you can search the first gen psychologist and I will come up as that as well. Um, but yeah, those are the main ways you can hire me, connect with me and, oh, the last thing before I forget, sign up for my newsletter.

So if this kind of conversation was really helpful for you, sign up for my newsletter. It's free and. With sign up as a gift that I have to you all are these two free guides. One is for navigating self-doubt and the other one is for navigating guilt that comes up, both of them, part of the first gen experience.

two free guides free only for: 2025

Beatriz: Amazing. Thank you so much, Dr. Lisette. I. I just know that people left today feeling really empowered, and that's an understatement too because there's so much that you share today with us in terms of your framework, your, uh. Ability to stay focused and, and the reminders that you share with us that we're, we're all very confident.

Um, and thank you for sharing how you've expanded throughout your career, how you've expanded throughout your entrepreneurship journey, how you continue to expand, um, and how we continue to navigate. That expansion. 'cause sometimes it's like you said, it's really scary, freaking scary, um, but we gotta learn how to support ourselves through that.

So thank you so much for your time today.

Beatriz: Thank you so much for tuning in to today's episode of the Beabosscoaching Podcast. I hope that Dr. Lisette's wisdom and story left you feeling inspired and ready to take action. Before you go, I want to invite you to reflect on the following question. What is your but or what is your what if that is getting in the way of your expansion?

Take some time to journal about this and remember the AND strategy that Dr. Lisette shared with us today. You can do this and that you are already confident and you have already everything that you need within you. If you want more resources, remember to come to the show notes where you can get all of the links to Dr.

Lisette's page, her Instagram and her LinkedIn. Make sure that you connect with her and go over to her website to download her freebies, and you can always come back to be a boss coaching.com where you can gather more resources as well that will support you in your journey. Here's something special.

Remember that next week is our final episode so make sure you don't miss it. Until then, keep expanding, keep showing up, and keep being the boss of your own story. I'll see you next time.